It's Time
by on sleepless roads
Summary: It's never easy to let go, especially if it has always been you she used to run to.


No, this couldn't be happening. Isn't it too soon? I feel like it was just yesterday when…who am I kidding? It was a lifetime ago. But all her laughs, and her crying, all her sweetness still seem so fresh to me.

I can still remember the first smile she ever gave me. It's like my whole world finally made sense as I looked at her smiling face that day, those bright eyes that could lighten even the heaviest of hearts. She had this laugh, too, this distinct laugh…that when you hear it, you know, you just know, that you're going to have a great day ahead of you. And don't even get me started at that pout. Oh, that pout, I can still remember the first time she used that on me. We were at an amusement park and she wanted to ride that big rollercoaster that had just been opened. I didn't, not because I was scared…err, I was scared for her. It was kind of huge, too huge for her. But she insisted, using that pout that I have now learned to both love and fear. Since then, I noticed the great increase of her having her way. I thought that pout of hers was practiced but, whaddayaknow, I was her trial dummy. But I can't say I'm complaining, because I'd give up a whole lot for her just to pout at me again and demand things she wanted. She was also genuinely caring, something you don't see much in girls these days. I remember being sick this one time, and she stayed up all night, making sure I drank my medicine and was sleeping well. I don't think I've told her enough how lucky I am to have her in my life, I was never one to be good at expressing my feelings. But she was never one to pressure, either. That was one more thing about her, her patience. She never gave up on people, always giving them time to think, to reflect, even if it meant sacrificing herself. Time, what a funny thing time is.

I guess I kind of knew I had this coming. After all, I couldn't keep her forever, right? It just wasn't like that in this life. Sometimes the people, the people you love most in the world, are the ones you have to let go. And it's her time now. There's no going back, no matter how much I'd want to. She just wasn't that girl anymore, who looked for me first when she was happy, who came running to me first when she was upset. No, someone else was there for her now. And I have to accept that, no matter how hard it is to. Want to know why? Because she was happy, happy beyond belief. And if letting her go is the only way for her to make that happiness permanent in her life, then it was worth it.

I watch how she is with him. You'd be blind not to notice that they were head over heels in love with each other. I'd be lying, too, if I said that I'm not amazed by the love between them. It wasn't something you see everyday. They would piss each other off, making the other suddenly want to commit murder, then he'd brood and she'd pout and after a while, they were back to being so in love with each other. There were also times when he'd tease her to no end and she'd tease back, kind of like a couple of five year olds. But it wasn't all play with them. No, I've also seen their tough times. The times when she'd cry herself to sleep, these were the same times I wanted to punch the poor sucker in the face, too. But I never did, because I knew I'd hurt her as well. They would make up after a few days, he would come see her with a bouquet of flowers and as much as I didn't want to notice, he was always sincere. I've been a witness to this love-hate relationship of theirs and as much as I'd hate to admit it, I've lost her. I've lost her to this man that she was crazy about and the only thing letting me sleep easily at night was this man's promise never to hurt. He better not or else I'd do more than punch his sorry face. I may not be as dashing as him, but I've got some moves, too. I think.

She comes to me, looking beautiful in her white wedding gown. I want to keep this image of her in my mind, smiling genuinely and looking more beautiful than ever.

"Appa," my little Ga Eul calls, okay she's not little anymore, definitely not. But she would always be my little girl. No matter what.

"Are you ready?" I ask her, half wanting her to say that she wanted to wait a little longer. Hey, I'm a father. That's how we all are supposed to feel on our only daughter's wedding day. But she nods her head at me, still with that smile on her face. How could say no to that? So we walk down that aisle, her arm linked with mine and I can't help but feel that this is too soon. Can't I have a little more time with my little girl? She was mine first, after all. I haven't even told her that I loved her, that I and her Omma would always be here for her. Or how about just one moment to hug her? To let her know that she was the greatest thing that happened to our lives? No? Not even that? Well, okay.

"Appa, it's time to let me go." she tells me as we reach the altar. I look at her beautiful face; tears threatening to fall from my eyes. She hugs me tight and whispers she loves me. I do what she says and lets her go, this time without apprehension. My little girl is all grown up now and she deserves to be happy. Her soon-to-be husband comes up to me and shakes my hand.

"Don't you hurt her, So Yi Jeong. She has a pretty good slapping hand." I tell him because, really, Ga Eul's slaps are more powerful than my karate chops.


End file.
